friendship – Marce's View

Today I want to share a story from one of my best friends, Aeisha. She is a Lupus Warrior and was kind enough to let me interview her. She also gave me permission to share her story with my readers.

Q: How old are you?

A: 28.

Q: When were you diagnosed with Lupus?

A: October 2012.

Q: What was your initial reaction to your diagnosis?

A: I thought I was going to die.

Q: What has been the most challenging part of living with Lupus? Has it held you back or prevented you from doing things you have wanted to do?

A: The most challenging part of living with Lupus is not being able to travel as much as I am used to. My lupus caused me to have kidney failure. Now I am on dialysis and it’s hard to just get up and go like regular people. Everything has to be planned.

Q: Are there any organizations/groups that have helped inform you more about Lupus?

A: There are a lot of people on Instagram that I follow and follow me because we share this same disease. It’s comforting to know that I am not alone.

Q: What are some misconceptions people have about Lupus that you have faced?

A: There are people that think those with Lupus are lazy. Just because you can’t physically see my disability, it doesn’t mean that it is not there.

Q: Where are you today with your Lupus?

A: Today, I am still taking my monthly infusions, which I think is helping. I haven’t felt any pain since getting on it. “Fingers crossed!” I still am on dialysis. I am also on the transplant list waiting for a donor.

Q: What keeps you motivated?

A: My education keeps me motivated. The fact that I’m working towards a goal keeps me going.

Q: Any final thoughts or words you want to share?

A: Don’t let anybody say you can’t be!

Lupus affects every person differently. Despite Aeisha’s struggles with this disease, she doesn’t let it keep her down and still works towards her goals. Aeisha is actually receiving her BA this month in Social Work from Rutgers University. So not only is Aeisha fighting her own battle everyday but she is working towards being able to help others in need. She is the definition of a Lupus Warrior!

I have been going through many changes in my life primarily in my career. These changes have been positive and have really made me realize I can apply positivism in different aspects of my life. This along with conversations with loved ones have persuaded me and motivated me to make some changes.

I use to think I was a really optimistic person but because I am human I have found myself sometimes having negative thoughts. That could range from being judgmental to the way I speak to others when I get upset or frustrated. Therefore, at the beginning of this month, I began a gratitude challenge and it really affected my outlook on life.

This month I decided to put on the optimistic/positive lenses on my glasses and have begun to look at life more differently. With so many blessings around me, I have realized there is no time to dwell on negativity or pettiness. I have to let others be and worry about myself because if change is difficult to do, it is basically impossible to make others do it.

This all sounds great and very easy however it is not! Changing is a difficult thing that takes a lot of will and self-control. I am very conscious of stopping my negative or judgmental thoughts but when it comes to action, it reached another level of difficulty.

Very recently, I had a falling out with a close friend. We spoke about the situation via text and I thought it was put to rest (to an extent). However, shortly after I noticed she stopped watching my stories on social media. YES, it sounds super petty that I even noticed but this is a close friend I am referring to. I was bothered by this because that takes EFFORT. To purposely stop watching someone’s stories either takes the push of a mute button or just physically skipping over selecting that person on your timeline. I was not sure what to think of it and considered addressing it but I did not. That same friend’s birthday rolled around and I actually considered not even saying happy birthday. This is where I had to take control of myself and say do the right thing.

You love this person and although they have resorted to this type of pettiness, do you really want to do the same? How does this play into what you are trying to do with your life today? How will you feel if you skip this person’s special day? These are all of the questions I asked myself throughout the day. Finally, when 6pm came around, I made the decision to send a simple birthday text. It was not my usual long mushy text but it was happy birthday text nonetheless. When I say being the bigger person in this situation was hard, it was HARD! My pride inner voice kept trying to sucker me in but I did not allow it.

I want to put out good into this world. I want to bring positivism and optimism to those around me. This can only start with myself. I know at times I will make mistakes but ultimately I will be making conscious effort to avoid those but also to accept when I do fall short and address that. I feel this is a great way to end the year and also bring into the new year.

Good vibes only & positive thoughts mostly!

Courage to keep changing, faith to keep pushing, love to keep spreading!

Tag: friendship

Lupus Warrior

Change is Hard!