Posts

The Return

marcetheblogger

If you have been following my blog, you know I went through a tragedy last year. At the beginning of 2021, at what I thought was a regular prenatal check up, I found out my baby had stopped growing and no longer had a heartbeat. It was probably one of the most difficult times I have ever faced in my lifetime.

I tried to get back into blogging but it almost felt forced. I tried to use it as an escape from reality and as a way to move on but it really was not working. I was trying to avoid dealing with my feelings and thoughts. To put it simply, I was a hot mess trying not to be a hot mess.

I felt completely lost and at times even helpless. I felt alone although I had close ones express their sympathy and show genuine concern. This was unlike anything I had ever experienced.

Today I am happy to say that I started therapy to try and help me cope with the loss I went through along with other issues. I have mostly good days now. There are moments where a baby picture or announcement still triggers me and I shed a few tears but overall I am in a much better place.

I will be back to blogging regularly and look forward to sharing some awesome posts in the weeks to come!

Stay Tuned!

Posts

Caring for Your Older Family Members

marcetheblogger

It is hard to believe that the years seem to just fly by in the blink of an eye.  As I get older, I realize that there is more that can be done for the older peeps in my family. It is like the roles have shifted and I now begin to take more care of them just like they did as I was growing up. This can help give you a sense of peace if you are not around or if you happen to travel for a lengthy period of time.

One thing to do is make them aware of any new scamming alerts. Scams tend to target the elder folks and sharing this information could prevent them from becoming the next victims. This could range from phone calls asking for confidential information or even strangers ringing their doorbell pretending to be their cable or light company. You can also add their phone numbers to “Do Not Call” registries. You could also suggest not answering the door if they did not set up an appointment for any repairs or installations.  They can always call their providers directly to double check any unplanned visits.

Another thing is quick lessons on how to use their electronic devices. Setting up a passcode to get in their devices is key to avoid any confidential information being tapped into if their devices are lost or stolen. Something as small as organizing commonly used apps on their main screen can lessen frustration.  Storing “Favorites” to their contacts so they can easily locate those they most frequently chat with can also go a long way. If they are up for it, you can also show them how to create grocery lists right on their devices and can make their shopping trips a bit easier to manage.

You can also try to ensure their safety in their home by any necessary modifications.  You can do this by making sure they have all of the proper equipment to alert of potential hazards; smoke detectors, carbon monoxide detectors, etc. If you are like me then you may not be sure if their detectors are properly installed.  If this is the case, then you could consider calling in professionals. Tech Services of NJ is your one-stop shop to purchase the essentials for any home and they can also do the installation. They also offer 24/7 monitoring on your home for fire and home intrusion, as well as repairs, should something go wrong. Be sure to check out this alarm system in New Jersey for all your security system needs and questions!

Tech Services of NJ

Another way to assist the elderly is to visit often. You may want to set up a schedule with other members of your family so that everyone can have a consistent rotation. Social interactions at this stage are very important. Not only do they serve as a way to spend time together but also presents you the opportunity to make sure your family members are safe, healthy, and even add some physical activity to get them active such as taking a walk. You can also utilize the time to sort their mail, check medications, or even help with tidying up or by washing some of their laundry. All of this can alleviate some of the daily tasks that could be overwhelming them.

I will mention the importance of having essential conversations. Although these conversations may be tough at first, you can find a way to ease into them by explaining how critical it is to have a handle on all matters.  You will want to make sure that you are reviewing important paperwork with them. You will also want to make sure finances are being kept up with. This will give you peace of mind in the event of an emergency.

One last thing, do not forget about yourself. Those who take care of their elders have been found to suffer from excessive stress, anxiety, depression and musculoskeletal disorders. Although the focus is to make sure your elders are taken care of, you will need to make sure you are taking care of yourself as well. If you lose track of your well-being, you will not be able to help anyone else.  If possible, split up the responsibilities between you and other family members. It is also important to take breaks, get away a bit and enjoy your life as well.

Can you think of other ways to help out the elderly in your family? Leave your thoughts in the comments!

Posts

Time to Spring Clean!

marcetheblogger

Spring is literally right around the color and I cannot contain my excitement!  This time of year always puts our household in cleaning mode. We open up the windows, turn on some music, and begin to tackle every room and storage container! 

With a family of 4 and a dog that sheds a ton, we constantly end up buying multiples of clothing because at some point, there is nothing that will remove embedded dog hair strands. To top it off, I have a teenager who changes her dress style often and a toddler who outgrows his clothes in the blink of an eye. All this together means by the time spring hits, our closets need major clean up.  We each are tasked with going through our clothes and getting rid of items that no longer fit, that are no longer our style, and ultimately that are no longer serving any other purpose than collecting dust.

In addition to our routine cleaning methods, this year we became concerned with black mold. We had a few tough storms and at one point some water damage due to some faulty areas on the roofing of the home we live in. After much research we found that if left untreated black mold could lead to various health issues including chronic coughing, sneezing, rashes, and persistent headaches. 

Fortunately, we discovered Nash Everett which provides air quality guidance for your home. If you’re unlucky and have a home plagued by mold, Nash Everett can offer corrective measures at a reasonable budget and I am all about staying within budget. These days many people have more sensitivities but you can trust Nash Everett has already thought about that because they prioritize working chemical-sensitive people. Removing mold from your home will ensure your health is good and this is key especially in a household with growing kids and a pet. It will also help your entire wardrobe smell its best! Clean clothes are the best type of clothes am I right?! So if you are in the New Jersey area, visit this mold removal in red bank business make sure the air quality in your home is healthy. They are sure to be there to make your home look and smell the best it can for years to come.

Image: Nash Everett

As you go through your cleaning, make sure to create separate piles. We always have a donate pile, a garbage pile, and a keep it pile.  Once everything is sorted, we don’t go back and second guess anything in the donate or garbage piles because they ended up there for a reason!  After this we go in and do any cleaning to our closets which could mean grabbing a vacuum or a good old broom and mop. Once we clear out all of the dust bunnies, we can go ahead and store our keep it pile.  This gives you the opportunity to revive some items that you may have forgotten about but ultimately love. Having a clean and fresh space will make getting dressed more enjoyable and easier and present you with opportunities to make new combinations of outfits you hadn’t even thought of which helps with sustainability! 

Happy Spring Cleaning! Make sure to leave any comments, questions, or suggestions of what you do to declutter.

Family, Mom Life, Posts

Car Ride Chit Chat

marcetheblogger

Last night I was speaking to my 12 year old daughter. She was feeling very talkative and I was loving it. No iPad around, no iPhone in hand, just a convo while I was driving.

Her topic of discussion: her father. Now I’m not here to bash him but I will speak facts.

Her father has never been actively in her life. He has his moments where he calls consistently for like a week or two but then falls off. He has random times where he will call to drop off food for her. He will also randomly call and ask to take her with him on certain weekends but then there are times where he will call, say he’s coming, and then goes MIA.

It’s a terrible cycle and I have hated it for forever. I have been told to cancel him out because what he’s doing is toxic but I always felt like if he’s asking to see her why not. Plus my daughter does enjoy seeing her other side of the family which is what drives her to even want to go with him.

Well last night she was telling me how she wishes she knew what it feels like to have a dad. She acknowledges her stepdad and her grandpa (my dad) but still wonders about having her own dad. She said she doesn’t envy anyone else but she does wonder what she’s missing.

Now if you know me you know I wanted to ball up and cry. I definitely feel guilty about who I decided to sleep with and who I decided to make a baby with (whether planned or not). But instead of crying or making excuses for her father, I decided to keep listening but then took the opportunity to explain some things to her which I will breakdown at the end.

I also want to add that my parents and I never openly spoke about sex. We never spoke about relationships. All I can remember hearing growing up from my dad was to be with someone on my level and/or someone who had goals and aspirations and was doing something to achieve them. When I had Jen I told myself I wanted to be open with my daughter. I wanted us to be able to speak about any and everything regardless of what it was.

All of this led to my input in last night’s conversation:

When thinking about having sex for the first time, be smart. You only get to lose your virginity once and you want it to be with someone you trust and care about. This also doesn’t mean you will be together forever but you want someone who will respect you and when you think back at that moment you aren’t ashamed or full of regret.

When you get older and having kids comes up, know who you are having a baby with. Get to know that person, their family, and address what it will mean to bring another life into this world. It may not always work out but it may help to establish a healthy coparenting relationship if needed.

Just wait, there is no need to move fast and grow up fast. Everything has its time and the more mature you are the better you will be able to make decisions. (I had my daughter when I was 20 and that was far from a mature age to make this decision – my opinion).

Now to some this may be a lot and you may wonder why the heck I would say these things to my child. But the beauty of having your own kids is you getting to choose how to raise your own kids. It may not be perfect but it definitely gives me a good feeling knowing my daughter is comfortable speaking to me about topics like these.

Key takeaways: Know your partner and learn them. This will help you both decide if having kids together will work. Also talk to your kids. In this age of social media, wouldn’t you rather talk to them about sensitive topics instead of having Instagram or TikTok teach them?

NOTE: This is not parenting advice. I’m just a momma who wants and tries to do her best each and everyday in this crazy world we live in.

Mom Life, Posts

International Women’s Day 2021

marcetheblogger

Empowerment means having the confidence to have control of self and receiving the support that is right. It means you are respected and have the power to do something. Much of women empowerment is mentioned in politics and is directed towards women in a professional career (rightfully so) but that leaves out a key role some women play in their life…being a mother.

Let’s think about this. We can carry another being (or multiples) for nine months! We then have to deliver these little ones and be in full mommy mode while recovering from delivery. As mothers we have to adapt to changes immediately and navigate parenting without a guide book! This is truly empowering. Of course, this does not minimize women in professional careers but shows appreciation and support for women who are at home nurturing their kids which is significant and meaningful.

Oftentimes, these women are overlooked and bombarded with pessimistic messages from family, friends, colleagues, and especially social media. Social media can portray a negative image of mothers because the messaging is women are wasting so many rights we fought to gain by being home and not doing “real work.”  

Motherhood needs more recognition and support and way less judgement.  There are many questions we think about when we go to bed at night and the key one is am I doing this right? So this March, Women’s Month, take some time to recognize a woman or women in your life who have made an impact on you or are making an impact in the world by caring for children.  A simple text goes a long way and can put a smile on another woman’s face and increase their confidence.  

This pandemic demonstrated how empowering motherhood can be. It opened my eyes to what being a stay at home mom really means. Waking up everyday with a toddler and preteen at home while having to work full time has not been easy but those tight hugs and goodnight kisses make it worthwhile. You see real power consists of choice, creativity, control and flexibility and mothers are out here doing it each and everyday.

Empowered Women Empower Women
Posts

A Different Type of Thank You

marcetheblogger

A few weeks ago, we had a work meeting where a colleague hosted a workshop addressing how we express our feelings.

How many times have you asked or been asked how are you and the answer was: “Good,” “Okay,” or “Fine.” Now think about how often there were other feelings and energy behind those actual words.

Oftentimes we tend to hide what we are actually feeling in an effort to avoid speaking more about what is actually going on or what is affecting us. We may think our feelings are negative and may not want to pass them onto others or we merely try to deny our own true feelings to ourselves. Some may also shy away from expressing joy or happiness especially during these times we are living.

During this workshop, we learned about other words to use to describe our current state (chart below). The most unique and important part of the workshop (for me) was when we had to do an activity where we had to think or write down how we were feeling in that moment (personally or professionally). At the end, we were instructed to thank those feelings and give a reason why. It was a great way to see the positivity in a negative mood or feeling and to also check our energy behind them.

Personally, I have been going through so much. I really went into the workshop with little intention to participate. I kept telling myself how much I didn’t want to speak about my feelings especially with coworkers. But of course bottling things within is never the solution and actually finding new ways to look within ourselves is pretty cool and can bring about a new perspective.

Below are some of the feelings I thank on a weekly (more like daily) basis. I encourage you to take a moment and try the same! Take time and observe your energy and level of pleasantness in this very moment. It’s nothing like finding that silver lining to motivate you to keep going!

Where do you land on this chart right now?
Thank You
Let's Get Personal, Posts

Accomplishments of the Week 2/19/21

marcetheblogger

Last week I shared a post of my accomplishments for the week and I feel like it’s worth sharing every week. It gets hard sometimes to see what you get done because we tend to focus on what has yet to be completed. We can be so hard on ourselves and although that can be motivating for some, it can definitely have the opposite effect for others. So let’s try to focus today on what we have gotten done even if it’s something as small as I washed my hair twice this week haha!

Who else is happy it’s finally Friday?
  • Paid off a credit card (I will share a post of how I got back into debt one of these days)
  • Worked out all week (This has been hard some days especially when I get emotional)
  • Increased my Pinterest impressions (Super excited about trying this out and it is going well)
Posts

This Week’s Top 3 Accomplishments

marcetheblogger

This has been quite a long week for me. 🕔🕙

Finally returned to work (virtually) after being off more than two weeks and I am super proud I didn’t let myself work outside of work hours or become overwhelmed. 👏🏽

Excited about starting my Pinterest business page which has already made more impressions than I thought I could get. 🥳

I am also proud to have found motivation to work out every day. Thank you to @masterconsistency for the push on Tuesday! 💪🏽

Happy Friday! 💮

Accomplishments of the Week
Posts

Only Believe Half of What You See

marcetheblogger
This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is img_5701.jpg
Westside Park – NJ

At quick glance, you see calm water and the bright sun, could be warm and cozy, however, it was windy and freezing. This quick snapshot just captures a single still moment in time but doesn’t define or tell what else is going on.

We live in a world where we are lead to believe everyone is living their best life (and hey, some probably are). Seriously though, everything posted on social media (for the most part) indicates everyone is just achieving all of their goals and doing great things, traveling to amazing places, and dressing nicely.

I received a message from one of my chapter sister’s this week that inspired this post. She said we don’t share our downfalls or losses often enough. I also listened to a podcast where someone shared how they don’t compare themselves to what they see because they don’t know what those people went thru to get to where they are. And they are both absolutely right.

So many people are fighting silent or hidden battles, illnesses, losses, and just plain daily struggles. Pictures are just single still moments and nothing else. We don’t know the work that was put into it or what someone had to overcome or what someone feels they have to prove to actually post that one picture. We also don’t know what struggles someone had to learn and surpass to achieve an accomplishment they share. But so often we catch ourselves getting consumed with this and feeling down about ourselves. You should just remember we are all works in progress and you may be envying or jealous of something that doesn’t even really exist.

So today try to think about the following:

  • Life is too short.
  • Tomorrow is not promised (same as the first, just worded differently).
  • Celebrate a small win.
  • Give someone a genuine compliment.
  • Call/message/text someone you haven’t spoken to in a while.

Remember: We all have our own struggles but sometimes reaching out to others can be just the medicine they need which in turn fulfills us as well.

Family

The Unexpected

marcetheblogger

January 20-21, 2021

What I thought would be a regular monthly prenatal check up turned into a nightmare that I will never wake up from. On January 20th just a day short of 17 weeks, my doctor couldn’t find my baby’s heartbeat with her Doppler. She moved me to the ultrasound room and as I grabbed my camera to record, I immediately knew something was wrong when I looked at the screen. It’s a picture that I see in my mind at different times throughout the day. I keep replaying it in my head thinking did this really happen?

You see after having two successful pregnancies with no major issues I never would have thought this would happen to me. At 17 weeks, I learned I had a fetal demise. My baby’s heart had stopped beating and they stopped growing. My doctor gave me two options, either induce labor and deliver my baby or have a D & C while under full anesthesia. Although I had the ultimate say, she highly recommended a D & C because she felt knowing my history and me that it would be too traumatic to try and deliver my baby vaginally. Ultimately, I decided for the D & C and was able to get an appointment for the next day.

It was such a weird car ride that day. I actually stopped at Dunkin’ and then parked and sat in my car at a park near my apartment. I just didn’t want to go home. I didn’t want to see how hurt my fiancé was and I definitely wasn’t ready to see my 12 year old who I would have to tell.

Honestly, I felt like a failure. I even asked the doctor what I had done wrong and she said nothing. Everything was normal in my bloodwork and previous scans so having no answers made it even more difficult.

While at the park I recorded some videos which capture how I felt in that moment. I was in disbelief but felt speaking about it to myself out loud would help me begin to accept what had happened. But I must say even days later I still don’t understand.

I have played the video from that day multiple times; a video I accidentally recorded but it captured every second of that nightmare. The one thing I feared and was paranoid would happen actually did happen.

My baby became an angel before I could even hold them. I try to pray a lot and try to find peace knowing God has my baby with him. I am not going to lie at the park I definitely talked to God and told him I didn’t get why he did this. I mean I still don’t but I have to believe it’s for a reason and that as time goes on I’ll see and accept it.

Pregnancy loss in the second trimester happens in about 2-3% of women. Typically by this trimester you have gotten clearance from your doctor to share the baby news so it does add to the hurt.

I don’t share my story to scare anyone but instead to keep spreading the word on how many women actually experience this type of tragedy. I hope that I find my peace soon and I also hope that this in turn helps someone feel like they aren’t alone.

Baby #3 – Although we never met, I want you to know we loved you. We wondered if you were a boy or girl daily and it drove daddy crazy. We will meet again one day and until then I hope you Rest In Peace my angel.

  • Confirming Baby #3
  • First sign of baby bump
  • Check in #2
  • My alien baby was growing
  • New Year bump
  • My angel
  • My daughter’s words to her sibling – excuse her typos

Mom Life

Pregnant? Know Your Rights!

marcetheblogger

So the other day I was speaking to my sister and I ended up thinking about that time. You ever have those moments? Where you think to yourself I remember the time…Well I did and what I am about to speak about often comes to my mind and upsets me because I did not know any better.

I began working at Champs right after I graduated high school back in 2006. For those that don’t know, Champs is a part of the Foot Locker chain. That summer I helped to set up the store which was brand new and then went on to work as a cashier. I worked there during each of my breaks from college until the summer of 2008 which was right before I had my daughter that December. At the end of that summer, I gave my two weeks notice and never returned.

What happened is unfortunate and I am sure has been experienced by many women. That summer my manager found out I was pregnant through another source (not me!). The moment she knew, I could tell. Instantly I saw the schedule which had already been posted was suddenly changed and there was a noticeable decrease in my hours. I did not feel comfortable addressing it with her so I went straight to corporate Human Resources. They contacted my District Manager who then proceeded to request a meeting with me after we had a phone conversation.

She made an attempt to make things right and at the time I guess I felt it was sufficient. I mean think about it…I was a young college student who needed the extra cash during the summer especially being pregnant. I was just worried about keeping my job.

During the meeting, she apologized on behalf of the store manager but then proceeded to present me with a write up! She told me it was for a no call/no show for a day that at that time was about a month old. Not to mention, I actually did call out but of course the manager claimed I had not. She told she would make sure I got my hours back but I also needed to sign the write up. This is where I didn’t know any better comes in.

I didn’t know any better back then. I stupidly signed the paper and went back to work as if nothing happened. Thinking back at it I had every right to decline to sign and then return to HR to express that I felt the write up was done as a retaliation tactic because honestly that’s what it was. The apology was for me to feel better but the write up was to make the Store Manager and DM feel better.

It upsets me to think back at this situation. I was a good employee for those two years. I barely called out and dedicated my evenings, weekends, and sometimes almost full days to them for extra cash. And at the end, I quit! I felt I had been taken advantage of and even more so now because I know I had rights as a pregnant woman I was not aware of back then.

I share this because if you are pregnant for the first time regardless of age, make sure you know your rights. And even if it’s not your first time, just make sure you read up on any changes that might have happened since the last time you were pregnant.

Below are some links to helpful resources:

https://www.nj.gov/njparentlink/career/maternity/

https://www.nj.gov/njparentlink/career/childcare/index.html

https://www.nj.gov/njparentlink/parenting/101/

Family

Bowling – COVID Edition

marcetheblogger

With everyone being home for the majority of their days, sometimes a night out can be really good for morale and trying to maintain some type of normalcy. So this past Friday, we decided to have a family bowling night at Bowlero. I decided to share this experience with y’all because a lot of questions came up for me related to what can be expected during this time at places such as these. So I figured you might be wondering the same.

Clear signage? Yes I can definitely say Bowlero had clear signs on their doors and arrows on the floors to try and maintain direction and control of which way people walked. Fortunately, we got there around 7PM so it wasn’t full at all. One tip: check to see if there are any specials going on. This could either save you money if you’re interested or keep you from going at a time with way more people. That night specials started at 9PM and as we were leaving, you could definitely tell the parking lot was more full and more people were coming in.

Temp check? No, they did not do temperature checks at the door.

Face masks required? Yes face masks were required the whole time even while bowling. The face masks could only come off if you were eating. They definitely had this emphasized on their TVs all over the alley.

Food? Yes food service was available. They actually had it where a waitress would come to your lane or you could walk and place an order at their counter. This was different because they did not previously have waitresses. I am assuming this was done to keep so many people from walking back and forth and around the alley.

Bar? Yes, the bar was open but not packed at the time we were there.

Arcade? Now here is where my concern was. Some people were eating at the tables behind their lanes but also walking back and forth to the arcade so I did witness some people with their face masks down in that area.

Bathrooms? The bathrooms were not as clean as I would think. The paper towel was sitting on the counter over the sink so it was definitely getting touched by multiple people and also damp.

Sanitizing? This was also something that stuck out to me. This facility did not have any hand sanitizing stations. Most places I have been to recently either have hand sanitizer available at the entrance/exit or throughout their facility for easy access. This was not the case at the bowling alley. Fortunately we had brought our own hand sanitizer to keep in our area but it would have been nice to have it around considering the many hands touching the equipment and arcade games.

Overall, we had a great time. The kids really enjoyed themselves and I did feel pretty safe. I know everyone has their own boundaries regarding going out so if you are considering bowling as an activity I would definitely say check it out at a time that is not usually busy.

Stay safe!

Travel

Who else has a National Park down the street from their home?

marcetheblogger

The Great Falls are absolutely amazing especially during the winter months. All of the water freezes and it looks like a real winter wonderland. But be careful it does get super icy to walk on and certain areas are blocked off because of the icy conditions. This is a must see if you are in the North Jersey area. They have updated some of the park so it is definitely worth checking out.

Photo Credit: @marcetheblogger
Great Falls National Park – Paterson, NJ

Friends

A Special Feeling – Dedication to KG

marcetheblogger

A friend of mine recently shared she was pregnant. I was overjoyed with the news to put it plainly. For one, 2020 was a hell of a year so any good news just seems to ignite an overdose of happiness these days. Second, it is so different when someone close to me is expecting their first. All babies are of course blessings and bring joy but it’s just something about a first time that hits a little different.

There is this indescribable feeling you feel once you become a parent. It truly is hard to put into words. This overwhelming feeling of happiness and love followed by the need and want to protect this little human that is a part of you. It will also suddenly enlighten you and you will understand why so many people cringe when others give them parenting advice. Suddenly, the joking about dropping the baby off every weekend at a friend’s house seems so unlikely because really who else could care for your kid like you can.

Knowing my friend will soon experience this with her fiance is what fills me with an abundance of happiness. They are two amazing people and I have seen them both grow so much throughout the years. I know they will be amazing parents.

Let's Get Personal

2021 Goals

marcetheblogger

Each year is a chance to start working on some new goals, adjusting previous goals, and crossing out goals that no longer apply. Personally, I love to physically write my goals down, yes with pen on paper lol. I enjoy being able to write each down with notes about what needs to be done to accomplish them. It allows me to cross off what is completed and also make any adjustments throughout the year. I feel establishing goals for yourself is a way to keep you motivated, hold yourself accountable, and also keep you focused on your bigger picture. You can set short term (3 months, 6 months, 1 year) and long term goals (3 years, 5 years, lifetime).

Below are some of my 2021 goals I wanted to share with y’all (in no specific order):

  1. Purchase a home
  2. Establish an LLC
  3. Create and maintain a workout routine
  4. Grow my blog by posting regularly to increase traffic
  5. Update my blog logo (already done)
  6. Get better at my job (more organized, increase involvement)
  7. Read actual books (at least 3)
  8. Learn more about the stock market and grow portfolio
  9. Strengthen my spirituality
  10. Get my daughter into a sport

Do you make goals for yourself each year? What’s your method of keeping track and holding yourself accountable?

Happy New Year! Let’s make 2021 our year!

Family, Friends

Surviving 2020

marcetheblogger

It would have been nice if at the strike of midnight on 1/1/21, we could have woken up from the 2020 nightmare. I won’t go on and on about how difficult 2020 was for each and everyone of us because I know I still struggle personally with the effects.

Despite all of the downs of 2020, there were some ups. I was able to get a promotion at work even during these trying times. We were able to celebrate several birthdays of family members and close friends which we appreciated so much more. Although celebrations were different this year, I think we can all say we upped our technology knowledge a bit by enjoying some ZOOM moments. Many of us took advantage of what the outdoors had to offer by picking up hiking, bike riding, or just plain walks around our neighborhoods.

All in all I just write this to say we survived. We pushed through and are still here. Can we say everything is going perfectly? Probably not! But I am happy enough just saying that I am getting through each day with some prayer, proper scheduling of breaks, and knowing when to just shut everything off and enjoy who is around me. Stay blessed! Here is to hoping 2021 treats us a little better than 2020.

Food, Travel

Who Doesn’t Love a Weekend Full of Food?

marcetheblogger

When anyone invites us to go camping or we make a plan to go, the first thing on our minds is: What are we going to eat? 🏕

Camping isn’t just about being out in nature! A huge part for us has been the food. I mean who doesn’t love to eat? 🥩🍗

This last camping trip we were fortunate enough to eat feast after feast after feast and no I’m not kidding lol. Some of us made breakfast and others made lunch/dinner. I mean honestly it seemed like the cooking didn’t stop so who really knows which meal it was lol. 🍽

These are just some pics of dishes we enjoyed during our trip: pupusas, skirt steak, pinchos, & grilled wings. 😍

Family, Friends, Travel

Fall Weekends

marcetheblogger

I was going through a “funk” for a little bit. Change of season, peak busy time at work, and still grieving all hit me and it was nonstop tears. This past week and a half I finally started to get past it but this weekend was def the final touch to regroup.

We unplugged from the world and it was exactly what I needed. We also didn’t bring the kids with us which means I literally got a break and alone time with my honey.

The nights were spent by the fire filled with conversation and laughter. It was an overall great time with my fiancé, cousins and new people. I loved that we had no phone service because it allowed us all to interact, explore, and eat (a lot) lol.

Many people I know hesitate to experience camping but let me tell ya it’s a must try. At least once!

How are you spending your Fall weekends?

Family

Hello October!

marcetheblogger

It’s officially October and that means pumpkin spice lattes, apple and pumpkin picking, and Halloween!

I won’t lie I am not the biggest fan of Halloween but for these two I def pretend to be haha.

This year we rushed to get into the spirit and actually purchased two pumpkins to carve ourselves. My daughter and I did the cleaning and my fiancé helped carve the faces. My son wasn’t too much help since he’s so small but he def loved seeing them light up.

This was a great family activity that didn’t take up too much time. It’s also a great way to get the kids away from technology for a bit and really opens up time for conversation. It’s truly amazing the things kids will speak about when given the time and space for it!

What fun things are you doing with your families this fall?

My son, John Jr., and daughter, Jena, with our two Halloween ready pumpkins.

Family, Friends, Travel

The Silver Lining

marcetheblogger

This pandemic has caused so much anxiety, hurt, sadness, stress, & worry. Sometimes it’s hard to see the silver lining but this weekend I had the pleasure of seeing it.

Despite all the negative feelings COVID has caused, it also helped put several things into perspective. People and activities we once took for granted were suddenly taken from us and made us realize how important they are.

This weekend we had a family day with some friends of ours. They came up from Hamilton with their daughter and we visited several spots that were great for kids.

This picture captured large groups of family and friends gathered together celebrating a special occasion or just a day spent playing games like potato sack races and two-legged race competitions. It was an amazing site to be able to see people truly enjoying each other’s company.

So let’s take some time to see some of the good that came from this pandemic. Can you think of any?

Posts

Black Lives Matter

marcetheblogger

It seems like we can’t catch a break this year. From the deaths of Kobe Bryant, his daughter, and others in a horrific helicopter accident at the end of January to the take over of COVID-19 shortly after. It seemed as if things could not get much worse but HA! we were so wrong!

Many callous acts against people of color specifically Black have come back to light. This time causing an uproar unlike any other in recent times. Protests, riots, and even looting have filled the streets in both the US and across the country.

I want to make it clear that I stand united with our Black community. Systemic racism has existed for far too long and change needs to happen!

Therefore, I wanted to provide some resources on how you too can help this cause. Thank you to my sorority for putting together this list. Just remember, these are only some of the many out there. Do your research. Educate yourself.

Donations:

Petitions:

Podcasts:

Books:

Articles/Websites:

Posts

Who else is working remotely?

marcetheblogger

I was definitely one of the people that always wanted to have the option to work from home. Little did I know that almost a month ago, we would have to make that switch abruptly. COVID-19 came in and flipped our world upside down and inside out.

The first week was extremely overwhelming. Feeling like a slave to my laptop, I convinced myself I had to work every second of every minute of every hour from 8:30 to 4:30. It took me several days to let that mentality go and just do what I could. I had to remember that breaks were important for my mentality, my physical we;;-being, and my emotional health.

Not only was I overwhelmed with work but suddenly I also became a grade school teacher. My daughter and I had to adjust and come up with a schedule and way of communicating that worked for us. It was not easy! Being home also meant having my little guy around more. He has become so attached I cannot even imagine what it will be like once I return to the office. Nonetheless having an almost 2 year old presented its own challenges. He suddenly felt all my web conferences were meet and greets and all of my supplies were for arts and crafts.

On top of all of this, social media became hypnotizing. It was bombarded by news of COVID-19 but it was also suddenly full of people saying things like, “Now you will see what stay at home moms go through.” Wow, was that super annoying!

Now hear me out here…I do not discredit what stay at home moms do. If you can look back at previous posts, I was one for awhile before returning to work from maternity leave. But there is a significant difference if that is your only job all day everyday. It definitely cannot compare to having a full time job, being a home school teacher, and watching a 2 year old all at the same time. Trying to manage these multiple roles while still trying to stick to your work calendar has been the MOST CHALLENGING yet.

A few times in the past weeks, I have had several emotional breakdowns. I mean literally crying hysterically at my kitchen table, in my bedroom, in the shower, etc. Check-ins with my director and colleagues has been so important. Just being able to talk it out, seeing how others are managing, and feeling understood have provided a sense of relief.

So what are some key things I have learned during this transitioning period…

  1. Relax! No one is really expecting you to be bound to your laptop all day (at least not in my case).
  2. Take breaks! This will help clear your mind and sometimes it’s what you need to keep on going.
  3. Check in! Whether you are communicating with others in your department or institution or even other workplaces, just check in. Social distancing does not mean do not speak!
  4. Look at the positives! At first this was difficult to do but when else will this happen? When will you be home with your immediate family and get to enjoy each other despite the challenges? Probably not any time soon.
  5. Be Kind! We are all watching and experiencing this pandemic. It is frightening but don’t let that fear consume you and make you angry. Instead, be kind! Reach out to those you love and reconnect.

Let’s stay strong.

Better times will come.

Keep praying for the world.

We will get through this together.

And remember…Live, Laugh, & Love!

Posts

Prepping for the Big Move!

marcetheblogger

For a long time, it has been a personal goal of mine to own a home.  Now this has shifted and has become a family goal of ours.  For years, we went through some struggles and setbacks which pushed our timeline back.  My biggest fear was that after going through some financial hardships that we would never reach homebuyer status!  At times we felt defeated and getting out of that rut felt so far away.  

After years of working together and coming up with a plan to get out of our financial rut, I am happy to report we have made significant progress.  So much so that today we find ourselves slowly prepping for the big move.  For now, it is just a plan with no actual determined date (this housing market is insane) but the plan is at least in some motion.  We are gradually beginning to check off all of the steps to finally be able to get into our first family home with our little ones and dog.

Although this brings a ton of emotions ranging from good to bad, they are all surpassed by excitement.  At times, it can get really overwhelming but staying focused on the big picture is what keeps us motivated to keep going.  The thought of having our own place for our kids to grow up in is the fuel we use each day. 

So for now in the middle of looking for homes, going to tons of viewings, and constant communication with our lender and realtor, I am already coming up with a list of what will need to be done once we have our very own moving day!  After many conversations with others who have been through this, I think a list will help make that part of this process the least hectic. 

To start, I have jumped right into Spring cleaning!  This time around I am not just swapping out winter clothes with spring and summer clothes, but I am also slowly getting rid of items we no longer need or want.  This goes way beyond just our clothes too.  We have a ton of so many different household items that we either have never used and some that have served their purpose. These items are ready to go onto the next person or the trash in some instances.

After lots of careful research and conversations with others, one of the main things is how will we get everything from our current place to our new home.  We have decided that we will utilize our close friends and family if they are available to help with the big move in exchange for some meals haha.  However, we will also be looking into a moving company.  When I was searching for some, I came across All In One Moving & Storage. They offer a variety of services including moving and storage in New Jersey, vehicle transport, and even packing supplies.  This will help eliminate having to wait for someone to help us out when they are free because we will be able to just contact the company and schedule them when we need them to be there. 

All In One Moving & Storage

Aside from this, anything we will not need right now has been stored in clear bins. I also added labels to the bins so we can locate everything after the big move. This is also just a great system to have when storing anything at all because it makes finding what you need so much easier. 

Another great tip I have gotten from an old coworker was how to transport our clothes. Between myself, hubby, and our kids we could open up a boutique so finding an easy way to move them was definitely a plus. He suggested using industrial strength hand wrap. He said you take a roll and literally spin it around your clothes on the hangars and then put them in a box. Once you get to the new place, you hang them and then unwrap them! He made sure to mention that it was the easiest part of his whole moving experience. 

For now, this is about as much as we can get done around the apartment while we wait to find our first home.  Some other items on the list are hiring a cleaning company for the new place and patching up any holes we may have made on the walls in our apartment.  Thankfully there were not many but if we can get that small task done it will be one less for the future. 

I cannot wait to keep you posted on how our journey turns up. I keep my faith everyday and know the one is out there and will come to us in due time!

Have you gone through the homebuyer process? How was it for you?

Posts, Travel

Vegas 2022 – Foodie Post

marcetheblogger

A few weeks ago, hubby and I took a quick weekend trip to Vegas. This was our second time returning but this time we didn’t bring the kiddies!

We stayed at Planet Hollywood which is conveniently located on the infamous strip.

Our trips are always very spontaneous and we don’t usually plan out what we will do. However, we definitely make sure to enjoy the food!

Check out this short video of some of the spots we visited! Alert: Food in this video will make you hungry!

Do you like to try new spots when you go away? How do you find where you will eat? Comment!

Posts

Backyard Ideas To Enjoy During The Warmer Months

marcetheblogger

Spring is slowly starting to spring up. Whether you are hosting an outdoor event for a small group of friends, there are plenty of ways to bring the family together that’s also simple to do. It can be very easy to go overboard with epic ideas that can blow everyone’s budget. Entertaining is expensive and hosting a family get together is no small task. After all, get togethers are about creating memorable experiences, rather than giving gifts or spending money. It’s about bringing everyone together and enjoying each other’s company while making these memories. 

Below are a few ideas to create some relaxing family get together moments. 

  1. Think of A Fun Theme- Your party theme will set the tone for the entire get together. There are so many exciting ideas and some of the family-friendly ideas include a fun sports theme such as tailgating with bags toss, listening to baseball on the radio, and encouraging guests to wear their favorite sports team. You could also have a pool party that can include filling up your outdoor pool or a fun fill-up kiddie pool. Encourage everyone to participate in water fights, Marco polo games, or water balloons. Some fun treats such as fruit and fish can be a fun way to bring the cool water to you and your guests.
  1. Activities – If you’re just enjoying a relaxing time with neighbors you want to make sure you have some activities as well for them to participate in if they want. Have some summer tunes going such as pop, oldies, or country. Think of an era that everyone can enjoy. Music is great so it’ll make your get together a fun little party. You can even ask what everyone wants to listen to and give them DJ requests. Having two or three games or challenges are enough to keep everyone entertained without having to force everyone into an activity. If your family is super sporty, ask your guests to bring their favorite sports equipment. A badminton set or a bocce ball game can add to the fun. For your neighbors or friends try to play simple games like ‘bop it’ or a card game or Uno. For kids, you can have them enjoy making a picture frame from the dollar store or making fun paper craft that matches the theme of the party you’re putting on.
Image: Peter’s Roofing

  1. Create The Perfect Spot – If you’ve been wanting to update your backyard with your guests, one way to do that is by creating a comfortable seating area for your guests to enjoy as well as an opportunity for good shade. Peter’s Roofing offers a variety of roofing options to keep you and your family, neighbors and friends shaded from the sunlight both inside and outside. This Newark NJ roof repair helps when you need to repair your roof, the shingles, add sunlight such as skylight, adding a chimney, gutter services or attic fan. 
  1. Plan A Scavenger Hunt – No we aren’t talking about a small little hunt but a fun adventure for everyone! Get a few fun objects and hide them in places around your backyard or even neighborhood. Create teams and clues and send each team on its way. The first team to come back with all of the hidden objects wins a prize. This is a fun activity as an alternative to the ever-popular movie or TV night with friends. 
  1. Food – You want to be able to enjoy your get together with everyone so have fun prepared ahead of time. Think of simple things your guests will enjoy and also give you time to socialize instead of being stuck in the kitchen the entire time. Some simple food ideas can be kabobs filled with chicken or fruit for people to grab, pizza bites made from bagels and pizza sauce as well as simple sandwich bars for guests to make their plate. 

With warm weather finally here, this might be the time we all need to start slowly socializing with everyone again. Take your time and invite only a few people over. Go with the flow on what occurs or have somewhat of a schedule for setting up food, games, and conversation times for everyone. What are some fun ideas you can enjoy with those you want to see most?