Tag: Friends

Friends

A Special Feeling – Dedication to KG

marcetheblogger

A friend of mine recently shared she was pregnant. I was overjoyed with the news to put it plainly. For one, 2020 was a hell of a year so any good news just seems to ignite an overdose of happiness these days. Second, it is so different when someone close to me is expecting their first. All babies are of course blessings and bring joy but it’s just something about a first time that hits a little different.

There is this indescribable feeling you feel once you become a parent. It truly is hard to put into words. This overwhelming feeling of happiness and love followed by the need and want to protect this little human that is a part of you. It will also suddenly enlighten you and you will understand why so many people cringe when others give them parenting advice. Suddenly, the joking about dropping the baby off every weekend at a friend’s house seems so unlikely because really who else could care for your kid like you can.

Knowing my friend will soon experience this with her fiance is what fills me with an abundance of happiness. They are two amazing people and I have seen them both grow so much throughout the years. I know they will be amazing parents.

Friends

Lupus Warrior

marcetheblogger

Today I want to share a story from one of my best friends, Aeisha. She is a Lupus Warrior and was kind enough to let me interview her. She also gave me permission to share her story with my readers.

Q: How old are you?

A: 28.

Q: When were you diagnosed with Lupus?

A: October 2012.

Q: What was your initial reaction to your diagnosis?

A: I thought I was going to die.

Q: What has been the most challenging part of living with Lupus? Has it held you back or prevented you from doing things you have wanted to do?

A: The most challenging part of living with Lupus is not being able to travel as much as I am used to. My lupus caused me to have kidney failure. Now I am on dialysis and it’s hard to just get up and go like regular people. Everything has to be planned.

Q: Are there any organizations/groups that have helped inform you more about Lupus?

A: There are a lot of people on Instagram that I follow and follow me because we share this same disease. It’s comforting to know that I am not alone.

Q: What are some misconceptions people have about Lupus that you have faced?

A: There are people that think those with Lupus are lazy. Just because you can’t physically see my disability, it doesn’t mean that it is not there.

Q: Where are you today with your Lupus?

A: Today, I am still taking my monthly infusions, which I think is helping. I haven’t felt any pain since getting on it. “Fingers crossed!” I still am on dialysis. I am also on the transplant list waiting for a donor.

Q: What keeps you motivated?

A: My education keeps me motivated. The fact that I’m working towards a goal keeps me going.

Q: Any final thoughts or words you want to share?

A: Don’t let anybody say you can’t be!

Lupus affects every person differently. Despite Aeisha’s struggles with this disease, she doesn’t let it keep her down and still works towards her goals. Aeisha is actually receiving her BA this month in Social Work from Rutgers University. So not only is Aeisha fighting her own battle everyday but she is working towards being able to help others in need. She is the definition of a Lupus Warrior!

Friends

Friendships Grow Apart…and It’s Okay!

marcetheblogger

Friendships…I have learned many things about this wonderful category of relationships throughout my life. Some lessons have been quite difficult especially getting older. So many times I have had falling outs with different individuals and then we have made up. This time around as a woman in my 30s (TOTALLY can’t believe I just wrote that lol) I have learned some relationships should be let go. No matter how much time, love, effort, and memories were created/shared, sometimes you just grow apart despite trying to find ways to stay attached or connected.

Thinking specifically about two people I grew up with and the fact that I will probably always call them my best friends, I know we took different paths in life, like COMPLETELY different. Once I returned home from college and found a full time job, I quickly jumped into my next degree program all while having a daughter and learning to accept that she would not grow up in a two parent home. Although we shared some similarities, our goals did not align. Yes we probably all wanted to be successful, be there for our families, while still maintaining a social life but our definitions of what that looked like were not the same.

I am happy to see that we have all grown and accomplished milestones in our lives. Our journeys took us different directions and that is okay. There is a certain point we reach in our lives where we have to begin surrounding ourselves with like minded people and at times it may be hard to accept that our once best friends are not those people.

This was definitely a struggle for me. I can tell you that I spent many nights thinking about this before bed and many long drives where it would cross my mind. For the most part, it was specific to one person because things did not really end well. We had some differences and it kept bothering me. With time though, it has become something I accept. The more I kept dwelling on it, the more I realized the relationship was not one full of motivation or growth and at this point in my life, that is what I need. I still think about it at times but I am happy with where I am in my life where my focus has shifted to my career, mom life, and health.

Be okay with change. Accept what is. Only worry about you can control!

Family, Friends

Who is really your friend?

marcetheblogger

I was actually inspired to write this after a conversation I had with my friend earlier today.  She was upset about her “best friend” and a little falling out they had.  Listening to her story, it really sounded like the friendship with her so-called best friend was really just a one way relationship.  

So what does this mean?  It’s a one way street, where everything just goes in one direction.  In a one way friendship, it means one person is on the receiving end and the other gets nothing in return.  For example, you have a bad day, you know you can call me.  You need money to borrow, I can lend it if I have it.  You need a ride, someone to help you change a flat, I’m there even if it means bringing someone with me to change that tire that I definitely wouldn’t know how to change lol.  BUT…when I call you for help or a listening ear, I get no response or an excuse.  I need someone to take me to do an errand, you make an excuse.  This is not an equal friendship!!  It’s really terrible to be honest especially when you realize it is happening.  It is very difficult to accept when you consider this person a true best friend.  It is HURTFUL!!!

So what can you do?  Well how I see it you can do one of two things…You can talk to that person and explain your feelings to them and how the situation can be mended OR you can simply tell that person that you have grown past the friendship and move on.  It sounds simple, YES!  But easy to implement…probably not but definitely not impossible.  

Once you realize how much you love yourself, you won’t put up with that type of friendship.  You will notice who truly values you and learn to truly embrace those people.  Believe it or not sometimes the most toxic relationships are ones you don’t even notice and are with those you consider the closest to you.

No time for negativity! 

Embrace the positive!!

Love those who love you!!! 

Set standards and accept nothing less!!!!